"I HAVE LEARNED!"

Philippians 4:10-20              (ESV)
"10 I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at length you have revived your concern for me. You were indeed concerned for me, but you had no opportunity.
11 Not that I am speaking of being in need, for "I HAVE LEARNED" in whatever situation I am to be content.
12 I know how to be BROUGHT LOW, and I know how to ABOUND. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing PLENTY and HUNGER, ABUNDANCE and NEED.
13 I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
14 Yet it was kind of you to share my trouble.
15 And you Philippians yourselves know that in the beginning of the gospel, when I left Macedonia, no church entered into partnership with me in giving and receiving, except you only.
16 Even in Thessalonica you sent me help for my needs once and again.
17 Not that I seek the gift, but I seek the fruit that increases to your credit.
18 I have received full payment, and more. I am well supplied, having received from Epaphroditus the gifts you sent, a fragrant offering, a sacrifice acceptable and pleasing to God.
19 And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.
20 To our God and Father be glory forever and ever. Amen."


Since July 09, 2007 it seems I am constantly finding myself saying "since the stroke".  I really don't want to glorify an event that was so traumatic in my history, but so much has changed in my perspective since that morning that most things are related "before the stroke" and "after the stroke".  The way things APPEAR to me has changed immensely!  When you wake up and fall flat on your face because you can't walk, AND then your ability to select the words you need to form a sentence evaporates, AND your mind is operating in a "FOG", you can't help coming face to face with mortality.

Imagine, all of the sudden, having your ability to communicate escape your control!  I began trying to slow my speech down to enunciate the INTENDED words coming out of my mouth. But no matter how I tried, the control over what was being said.  Frustration was abundant for I HAD NO CONTROL!

The Apostle Paul experienced a similar occurrence on the road to Damascus.  He was blinded and all of the sudden could not see.  Having to have someone assist you with your every move goes against every fiber of our being.  It took me years to realize how vulnerable I was, and still am, in everything I do.  It took Paul less than a week to come to a realization of what he was and how vulnerable he was.

When you finally come to grips that GOD above PROVIDES for you, whether in ABUNDANCE or NEED, it makes circumstances a lot easier to accept.  Paul received gifts sent by the Macedonians and Thessalonians, but the gifts were from GOD (v. 19).  It has taken me a while to say "I HAVE LEARNED", but to come to the understanding that GOD uses the bad times as well as the good times to mold us into a vessel that can glorify HIM.  "I HAVE LEARNED" that I am still learning, and I will be learning until that day!!!